One of the keys to attaining what we want is coming up with a complete picture of what we want our future life to look like. This is repeated in works by abundance authors from Wallace Wattles in The Science of Getting Rich to Napoleon Hill in Think and Get Rich. However, I don’t know about you but there was a time when I felt overwhelmed at this type of statement. What if I get it wrong? What if I change my mind? Then I read somewhere that God has that in his plans. It’s the reason why we don’t get what we think of the moment we think of it. It that had been the case, then my daughter would have a pony, a unicorn, and a dragon living in her room with her.
Instead, we begin to build wealth with our mindset first, by removing doubt that we will indeed be able to attain our goals and desires. We visualize what we want in the future in order to give ourselves and the universe an ultimate goal. But I’m ere to tell you that these thoughts can change and evolve over time. You can refine your vision. You can change your vision altogether. As long as you continue to remain positive that you will be able to achieve your desires and you continue to work in the most positive way on your day-to-day tasks, you will achieve your goals.
Now, I’m not saying that if you change your goal everyday, this will make things easy for you. In fact, this will probably delay your achieving your desires anytime soon. A moving goal is very hard to miss. Therefore, it’s a good idea to nail down at least some of your goals and desires so that you have a concrete vision towards which you can keep moving.
Is This the Thing I Want in My Future?
There was a point in my life when I was deciding whether to stay with someone with whom I’d spent many years. There were things I liked about this person but there were also things that I hated, especially the way he treated me when he was angry. One day I came across a book called, Are You The One For Me? by Barbara De Angelis. This book truly changed my life that day. It not only made me see why I had stayed with that person, but it also gave me the backbone to see why I had to leave the relationship.
The Formula for Your Perfect Partner
The premise of the book is that you need to create a baseline starting point of what you want in your partner. You break it down into every aspect of their person: spiritual beliefs, physical characteristics, emotional attitudes, hobbies, etc. You write down exactly what you want your perfect partner to look and act like. If you want them like old movies, be tall, and like to run marathons, each of those items goes in the appropriate area of your list. Then you rate any potential partner with this list out of ten. Next, you create a percentage score of how closely a person matches your perfect mate in each area. In the end, you will get a picture of where they most closely and least closely match the picture you have in your eye. When I was done with my assessment, I had areas that were close to 90% with my partner, and I had areas that were below 50%. It was obvious to me why I stayed and why I hated it at the same time.
I’m sorry if that took awhile to explain, but what I have discovered is that I am able to use this same formula in all areas of my personal life! I can look at an area, say my home. I then start thinking about what my perfect home would look like. Would it be one-story or two? Would it have a lot of land or a little? By breaking it down to smaller pieces, I’m able to truly think about what I want. I can then look at my current situation in each of these areas and see how close I am. I am able to use this information to make small tweaks in the now and to visualize big changes in the future.
Categories and Questions for Creating the Life You Want
Following are ideas of categories and sample questions that you can use as a start for coming up with what it is you really want in the future. Note that I’m not including the list for the perfect mate as Barbara DeAngelis truly does an amazing job of this in her book which I definitely would pick up and read if you are worried about or looking for the perfect relationship. Also remember that as you go through these questions, you’re creating your dream. You’re thinking about them the way a child does when they look through a Toys ‘R Us catalog at Christmas time. Remember, this is your life, your future so have fun!
Do I want a one- or two-story home? Do I want a little or a lot of land? A traditional or modern home? How many bedrooms do I want? How many bathrooms? Do I want neighbors close by? Do I want to live on a lake? In a subdivision? In a big city apartment?
Do I want a big or small car? A sports car or a touring car? How many people will my car seat? What color do I want my car to be? What features do I want it to have?
What types of occasions do I hope to attend? What types of clothing do I want to wear to these special occasions? How about my everyday clothes? What type of style do I gravitate towards? Eclectic? Traditional? Modern? Do I want to shop for my own clothes or have a personal shopper?
Do I want a designer to purchase my furniture for me? What type of style do I like the most? (It’s best to flip through home magazines and pull out pictures of rooms you like in order to determine your overall style.) Do I want furniture to be comfortable? Make a statement? Is there a particular piece of furniture that I’ve always wanted? (For me, it was a chaise lounge in my bedroom). You don’t need to have an image of each piece of furniture or item in your home, but more an idea of what type of feel you want in each room to be able to rate how close you are to this idea.
Do I want to have antiques in your home? What type of antiques do I want to collect? Do I want to be able to display items I’ve collected? If so, how and where? If I could collect anything, what would it be?
Do I have places you want to visit? Where in the world do I want to go? How do I want to get there? What type of accommodation do I want to have when I visit there? What do I want to see in each place? Are there foods I want to try? Special events I want to experience?
What do I want to do with my free time? Do I love to dance? To swim? Do I want to go to art museums? Do I like plays? Concerts? Imagine doing these hobbies, immersed in them.
This can be a tough area for many. I will be writing specifically about this in a future blog post. However, it is best to start with the thought of what you would be doing if money were no longer an object.
What hobbies consume my time and make me forget where you are? Has there ever been a time in my life when I lost track of time while working? What was I doing then? Did I see myself doing a specific job as a child? What gives me joy in life?
Answering these questions can help you come up with a vision of a perfect job. Even if you don’t know how you would make money at that job, just holding that vision can lead you down paths towards something that can truly be life-changing. That is exactly what happened with me and the postcard business that I purchased.
What would my perfect financial life look like? Would I have a balance on my credit cards? Would I have a house loan? How much would I have in your retirement account? How much in my bank? Would I buy a car with cash? Would I own stocks? Bonds? How about gold and silver? How much money would I have in each of my children’s accounts? What amount would I give to charity each month? Which charities would I love to support? How much would I give to family members in need?
What is the perfect weight for me? How active do I want to be? What types of food would I want to be eating daily? How energetic would I be in my perfect world?
Rating and Changing Your Current Reality
Answer these questions and come up with your own. Once you are done with an area, you can rate how closely your life matches that area. For each item on the list, decide out of 10 where your life currently stands. For example, if you have completed your perfect financial life picture, and you said you wanted to have no debt but you have a lot of it, then that would be rated really low. Let’s say you rate that a 2. You do that for each of the items you put down for your perfect life in the financial life. Then you add up the total points you awarded. Let’s say out of five items you wrote down, your total was 30. The total possible score would have been 50 (5 * 10). This means that in the financial realm you currently score 30/50 or 60%.
The lower the number, the further your current reality is from your future reality. By doing this for each area, you can see where the biggest stressors are in your life. You can also see where you can start making the biggest differences the quickest. You might be able to find quick fixes to start to bring these numbers up. For example, if you found that you really want to start a hobby you can probably begin today. Or if you really want to decorate your home in a different style, you can start going to garage sales and flea markets to find cheap buys to make this come to life.
Hopefully, this will help you begin to define what you really want for your present and your future. Remember, there are no right and wrong answers. You can and will change your mind. Just go with your gut instincts, and you will be find.
I wish you all the best of luck in your future as you create your own dream life.